Independence Day Reflections

It never ceases to amaze me when I first see my kids driving. The amazement doesn’t come on the day they get their license. I’m not quite that quick on the draw. Instead, it’s the first time I watch their taillights leave the drive. The first time they run to the store for me. Or, as in the case today, the first time they meet me at a restaurant for lunch.

It’s not my first rodeo. Yet, again, I was taken aback when she pulled into the parking spot next to me grinning from ear to ear. As walked into the restaurant, she chattered on about her independent shopping adventure and her thrift finds.

Independence is a great thing and I love that my kids want to be independent. It just takes me a minute to catch up.

It seems like I’m always trying to catch up. Motherhood isn’t stagnant. It has a swift-flowing current that pulls me around bends, over rocks, and through canyons… always moving and always changing. Just as soon as I get accustomed to who my kids are and where they are, there’s another season of growing and changing and I’m running behind to catch up.

Don’t get me wrong. I love every bit of being a mom! Twenty-three years in and it’s been the most rewarding ride ever. I love seeing who they are, where they are, what their lives are becoming. It’s my deepest joy to have a front-row seat to watch them live their adventures with Jesus. Sometimes, though, I forget to keep up with them and then I have moments, like today, where I am taken aback at how much things have changed.

I guess that’s what I thought today as she smiled at me when she pulled in. As we got in line to order our lunches, my mind wandered. While she was sharing the bargains that she found and the projects she’s starting, I was remembering the littler one who often felt left behind while her siblings exercised their own independence.

One of the great joys of motherhood is the memories of the good days, the bad days, the fast days, and the slow days. I hold my memories close. In fact, her sister commented today that the only thing I collect is memories. {One hundred percent the truth.} Truly, the memories of the bends, rocks, and canyons of mothering and homeschooling all three are sweeter now that our family is spread across the country.

So today became a reflective day because, at some point when I wasn’t really paying attention, the littler one became an independent one.

And, I’m still catching up.

Delighting

Trust in the LORD and do good; dwell in the land and cultivate faithfulness. Delight yourself in the LORD, and He will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the LORD; trust in Him, and He will do it. He will bring forth your righteousness like the dawn, your justice like the noonday sun. Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for Him; fret not when men prosper in their ways, when they carry out wicked schemes. Psalm 37:2-7

I heard a sermon Sunday on delight. One of the questions asked was, “When was the last time you found delight in God?”

Delight=a high degree of gratification or pleasure/extreme satisfaction

A year ago, I would have had no answer.

Today, I know that I find delight in God often. I notice ways He shows His love to me. I see the gifts of gratitude again and I smile more. Even this morning while brewing coffee, I looked out at a beautiful sunrise and watched a doe meander through my yard as if she hadn’t a care in the world. Delight.

God gave me a beautiful picture and a gentle reminder. He cares for the doe as He cares for me. So why do I stew and fret, so?

Delight is the antithesis to worry. I can’t worry and delight at the same time. Delight sheds light and joy and dispels darkness and worry every single time.

Beth Moore says, “We’d be hard-pressed to find a more delightful concept in Scripture than delight. Delight’s more than joy. It’s joy with a shot of espresso. Peace with a side of playfulness. Steadfast trust with a twinkle in its eye. Acceptance of adversity that knows a surprise party’s coming.”

I added delighting in the LORD to the list of things I want to do in 2020 today.

What about you? How do you delight in the LORD?

Reclaiming My Writing Muscles

Writing exposes my soul.

I suppose most writers feel this way.

Writing is cathartic for me. It’s how I process things. I prefer to type because my fingers can more easily keep up with my brain on a keyboard. I write to think things through and am most surprised at what comes out on the screen. Sometimes, though, I can’t find the words to process what is in my heart. And, sometimes, I have felt like I’ve lost my words.

I’m sure I’m not alone in this, either.

Last winter, I met an amazing woman who shared a prayer request at a Bible study where we were guests. She simply asked the group to pray that she would regain her singing voice. She said, “I used to sound like Ariel singing, and now I sound like Scuttle.” The vulnerability of that prayer request resonated with me. When the Bible study ended, I approached her and told her that I would pray for her. I told her a bit of my story and asked her to pray that my words would be restored to me. She has been incredibly faithful in praying for me for almost a year. At Christmas time, she sang at her church and recorded it for me to hear! God is in the restoring business and I asked her how she was able to get her voice back.

Her answer, “I prayed and I practiced. At first I would just sing a verse of a song. Then after a bit I was able to add the chorus. I just kept at it day after day and as I exercised those muscles, little by little, my voice came back.”

She then encouraged me to start 2020 writing again. She said, “just write 250 words a day at first. It doesn’t matter what you write, just write.”

I started with 250 and now am up to 750 or more a day! She was right. Just write.

So, to my fellow writers, I have a tip to share that I recently learned from a fantastic motivational speaker that I’m now following. She shares unvarnished truth daily and a weekly email chocked full of great tips.

One of the tips this week was this website- 750words.com. 750words.com is a free platform designed for freestyle writing. Your writings are stored there daily for just you to see. It’s motivating. It’s unfiltered and, it counts your words for you! 🙂 {truly helpful when you think you can’t possibly get to 750 words and then you realize you only need to write 132 more #truestory} 😀

For a rusty writer, such as myself, this is exactly the kind of practice and workout my brain and fingers need to regain my writing muscles.

It feels so good to be writing again!

Fellow writers, what motivates you to write? Do you prefer paper and pen or a keyboard and screen?

Reclaiming

As we sat in the auditorium and opened our Bibles to John 10, my man reached over to hold my hand. Tears streamed down my cheeks and leaked out of his eyes. It was his first time to sit with this congregation and only my second. Yet, the pastor spoke words that went straight to our hearts. He spoke on reclaiming our stolen property. Those things that the enemy has taken from us. Things like hope, calling, faith, dreams, ministry, health, family…. and in this case a blog.

What this pastor doesn’t know is that I had used the very word “stolen” in a conversation Chad and I had earlier in the spring. I felt as though so much was being stolen from me and I had no recourse. I knew of no way to reclaim my stolen property. I simply lamented.

Thankfully, this pastor not only identified things that the enemy steals, he gave us actionable points on reclaiming. I cried tears of gratitude and hope through the rest of his message.

That message heard in July of 2019 became my catalyst to reclaiming so much of the abundant life Jesus has given me. I’ve listened to this message over and over again and have written it out in my Bible. I took my faith and hope back. I reclaimed my family, my business, my health, my calling, my writing, and now my blog. 🙂

Truly it makes me sad and mad that he stole from me but I’m more grateful for the warning I heard. You see, the enemy isn’t content with just stealing. Sure, he’ll start out with petty larceny but he keeps going. The thief only comes to steal, kill, and destroy (John 10:10). He isn’t satisfied until there is mass destruction in my life, or yours.

The second half of 2019, I began reclaiming… taking it all back. It seems like the more I’m taking back, the more I realize how much was stolen.

So, 2020 is my year of reclaiming.

It feels good.

Do you have a word for 2020? I’d love for you to share in the comments.